WCA Childrens Ministry

The Power of Culture

If you’re even a semi-frequent flyer, you know there’s a very real, unspoken culture among air-travelers. When entering a plane, you carry your bag in front of you to reduce the risk hitting a seated passenger. You look around before reclining your seat to make sure the person behind you has enough room. Most importantly, those ubiquitous white Ipod ear buds serve the same function as a “Do Not Disturb” door hanger at the hotel.

Unfortunately those cultural norms don’t apply at home. Recently, I set my bags in my home office, grabbed a book, reclined my easy chair, and piped Coletrane into my ears with those white ear buds. The unspoken message to the family was clear: I need one uninterrupted hour to unplug.

My eight-year-old, Nate, didn’t get pick up on my non-verbals. He just didn’t know how to decipher airline culture.

“Why are you reading The Golden Compass? Isn’t that book against God?”

The look on Nate’s face was one that should be reserved for a grave occasion, like walking in on your VBS coordinator ordering homemade fireworks supplies to use for crafts.

I raised my seat, turned off my music, and explained that if we want to be able to share Jesus with the unchurched that it’s important for us to understand how they think.

Nate’s face softened, but he wasn’t convinced. “But the book makes fun of church.”

“And I want to understand why the author feels that way.”

The moment was interrupted when his brother’s pillow fight crossed the living room. Nate joined the rolling tumbleweed of limbs and laughter as it careened into the bedroom.

…

Too often, we run our children’s ministries completely oblivious to our surrounding culture. Like Nate, we miss important cues that might tip us off to what our neighbors are thinking about God or the church.

Or worse, we generate fear-based responses to pieces of the surrounding culture that represent opposition to God’s kingdom. We protest and boycott and miss out on opportunities to engage our neighbors and start a conversation with them.
Conversation. That’s the point of studying culture. We need to understand the thinking or the children and families we want to serve so we can make Jesus understandable to them.

What disciplines are you building into your life to keep you in touch with the thinking of the unchurched?

Larry Shallenberger is Pastor of Children and Student Ministries at Grace Church in Erie, Pennslyvania.
Larry is a monthly columnist for www.churchvolunteercentral.com and the author of several books and magazine articles.

He'll be hosting a book club at the Conspire Conferencebased on
Lead the Way God Made You: Discovering Your Leadership Style for Children’s Ministry. (A11)
Larry will also be leading a session titled, "Cultural Trends That Affect Children's Ministry". (B49)

You can read the first chapter of his latest book Divine Intention: How God’s Work Empowers Us in the Early Church by clicking here.

Thoughts from Lou Ann

I just read a great book by Mark Holmen.

Building Faith at Home is one of those rare books that not only challenges the way we do ministry, but actually suggests some practical steps to change our church culture – one family at a time.

We know the statistics.  We’ve read Barna; we’ve been to conferences; we’ve seen the results of drop-off children’s ministry.  We’re all praying, thinking and dialoging about how to make our ministries more effective and turn the statistics around, and yet – change is painfully slow.  Parents still seem apathetic when it comes to assuming responsibility for the faith of their children.  In the minds of Christian parents, they’re leaving the process of their children’s spiritual formation to the professionals – after all, it works with piano lessons, soccer and calculus!

I am determined that things will be different for the kids in my church.  I am determined that my kids will have every opportunity to accept Jesus as Savior; I am determined that my kids will become fully devoted followers of Jesus; I am determined that my kids will not walk away from their faith and church when they leave home for college.

That’s why I’m so excited about Holmen’s book.  Holmen advocates taking a different avenue to family ministry.  Just as many churches have adopted the phrase, “a church OF small groups” rather than “a church WITH small groups,” we must become a church OF family ministry.  We must “focus on the home as the primary place for nurturing faith.”  Everything we do at church – small groups, men’s ministry, Bible studies – even sermons – must equip the family to live out their faith at home.  And here’s where the book gets practical.  Already having child dedication Sundays?  Meet with the parents of these young children and teach them how to pray over their babies.  Already honoring your high school graduates?  Use this as an opportunity to equip their parents to prepare their kids for the test of faith called “college.” 

Holmen suggests having annual “Take It Home” events for every age group – and these events are held on Sunday when families are already at church!  Why didn’t I think of that?  Once a year, parents join their child’s small group for a “Take It Home” event.  And here’s another good idea – with every event, you send home a tool to reinforce your topic.

Strategic curriculum, family productions, family newsletters, making children’s ministry the best hour of a kid’s week, and now Take It Home – we might just have an impact that can change lives!

How about you?  Have you found that anything you’re doing makes a significant difference in the way parents view the spiritual formation of their children?

Lou Ann Pence is the Children's Director at Vale Community Church in Bloomington, Illinois

She'll be presenting C101 "Developing a Volunteer Handbook" at the Conspire Conference in April.